The signs were there from the earliest age.
When I was in high school, I met the love of my life. Her name was Mary, and she was everything that I dreamed of. She was smart, beautiful, and strong but demure at the same time. Her parents came from money. She had class and wealth, but she didn’t let her parents’ money go to her head. Mary was open minded and took in all the information around her like a sponge. Not to mention, my parents loved her. I even wanted to marry her.
At some point, I thought of proposing to her. But by the time I got to college I realized that my heart wasn’t fluttering, I didn’t want to. I felt the same lump in my throat, like when I was forced to go to the dentist after a toothache. I broke things off with Mary.
It was the start of a new quarter so I decided to just busy myself with class. For once Mary and I didn’t have any classes together, which was a relief. I immersed myself in philosophy, journalism, and anthropology. I was determined to get my bachelor’s in record time. I was so focused — in fact — that I didn’t even notice Richard at first. Not until the second half of that quarter when we were paired together for a project.
Richard was an elegant man: tall, thin frame with angular features and black frames that sat upon a delicate nose. He pulled out a chair and sat next to me in the quiet library. As soon as I saw his smile, I instantly fell in love. He was more beautiful than Mary — which I thought was impossible. I had to have him. I had been attracted to guys before, but I never thought anything of it. I just brushed it off as admiration. Now I knew it was different. This was an animal attraction.
Richard and I met in private at first: brief excursions to the local coffee house, parks, and our respective dorm rooms. When we finally kissed, it was as if everything had fallen into place. I invited him home for Thanksgiving but he insisted that I come out to my parents before he would even consider meeting them.
My father was livid. He was disgusted by the fact that I said I loved both men and women. It was almost as if I had broken off the engagement with him. I was thrown out the day before Thanksgiving and I spent the rest of the weekend in my dorm room. It was the lowest point in my life. I was kicked out of school when I couldn’t afford the tuition. My father disowned me despite my mother’s objections. She fronted me a little bit of money so that I could find myself a studio apartment and a job. I worked anywhere that I could and as much as I could. The more time I spent working, the less time I could spend wallowing in my own self-pity. What had I done? I put my own selfish wants before my needs. Before my obligations. I thought it was the worst decision I had ever made. But then I realized that it was the best.
One night, while I was working as a waiter at a diner (one of three jobs that I had at that time), I noticed a pair of regulars. It was this sweet old couple that came in every night. They would spend their time talking about their old adventures, then order a couple of coffees and a single scoop of ice cream to share between themselves. I looked around. Most of the men and women at the diner at that time of day looked sad and lonely, but not these two…. What was their secret? That’s when I saw it. He caressed her cheek and kissed her. Her cheeks flushed and she giggled like a schoolgirl. He still had it. He still knew how to seduce her.
That’s what’s missing from our relationships these days. Seduction and passion. We aren’t seducing our partners anymore. We just expect sex because we’re in a relationship but just plain sex can get boring and tedious. There’s no passion in just going through the motions. There’s something sexy about being seduced by someone. If your partner puts the time and energy into setting the mood, making you feel special, and plays all the right moves, you can just melt in that person’s arms. Dating, committed relationship, or marriage, it doesn’t matter. Every partner deserves to feel like a prince or a princess in their relationship.
And yeah… I’m a bisexual man simply sharing his truth if you don’t already follow me via email you can subscribe by clicking here. As you know I write paranormal romance under Noah Harris and all of my contemporary works are under John Harris.
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